Absentee Vote

Hey everyone sup!! Well, anyways my japanese has been improving. I can feel it! Not only that but I'm starting to remember my old grammar structure and stuff it is all coming back to me! I feel soo good about but today I had to take care of some business yah dig. I had to send in 2 very important document 1 was my scholarship application. Yes, I'm on partial scholarship and every little thing counts and helps thanks UNLV! The other document was the absentee ballot! You know I definatly voted for Obama/Biden! Besides I had to do it and when I mailed it it felt soo right because I know I'm contributing to America and helping them get a better president! Besides my country is in deep trouble and it needs help!! I'll also be translating this in japanese on www.lang-8.com for those studying japanese this site really helps alot!! I also went to this movie club I wasn't interested but the fellas seem to like me and my charismatic ways ;)!! hhehe yah dig I kept eating all the cookies so I promised them I'll buy them a new batch but hey yah gurl was pretty hungry! but luckily my japanese friend Tai came to the rescue and texted me saying he was finished early so of course I rushed out of the room politely of course to get some grub ;)! But other than that I realize that staying in the dorms is not for the shy folks at all. If you're shy don't do the dorms because I feel that you're not forced enough to speak esp. when it's necessary and you're overseas. Luckily, for me I'm pretty outgoing so the dorms wasn't that big of an issue and I've been getting more practice at japanese and plus I'm just determined to learn this language and become fluent. I also went to Osaka over the weekend to improve my fashion. So yes, my fashion is on point now it is officially high class fashion. Besides at my school it looks like a catwalk all these ladies looking good so of course I want to represent and bam bought new clothes. I'll buy new clothes this weekend but I want to buy some more skirts though. Other than, that I'm thinking about cooking some american food for my friend saeko in exchange for using her refridgerator. Hey I was raised not to be a moocher so I have to give back. Other than that, my classes are pretty interesting esp. kabuki and history. For the first time, I'm going to have fun studying these subjects.... well anyways woo I'm exhausted I will write more well peace!

back on track!

Hey yall' I've been soo busy lately, but now I can finally talk to you guys! My life has been great real talk. At first, I was real scared to move into the dorms but now I'm really happy about the situation. I haven't made a lot of japanese friends due to obvious language barriers. But the quality of the friendship with a few japanese friends is good enough for me! I have a great friend name Megu. I met her on the streets but over the weekend she actually drove me to Ikea to buy some decorations for my room. She was such a sweetheart. I can tell she geniunely likes me so there's a real connection between us. We had a lot of fun and it was nice practicing my japanese with her and same for her with her english! She told me that her parents saw me before heheh that's funny since I'm the only black person in Ashiya. hahha other than that she helped me get my stuff into my room she was a very sweet person. Her father is a famous artictect in Kobe. I saw pics. of her house and wow she's really wealthy. So yes, nice choice on the friends :D. The next day I met up with Mayumi and her cute 5 yr. old son Curtis. Curtis is the half black/half japanese. I usually don't like little kids but me and Curtis have this connection and plus it's soo cute that he has a crush on me too :D hehe! Curtis is soo adorable and he asked me if I can come to the zoo with them. Mayumi was like she was too old, and I was like heey I would love to go to the zoo with him. It'd be great practice and plus I can spend time with Curtis. I usually hate kids but this little kid I really like though! On monday, I went on a school field trip to Himeji Castle. Sadly this will be the last year the castle will be on exhibit because it will be closed 5 years later for restoration :( aww poopies but yea it was soo nice speaking english to everybody. I felt soo comfortable and of course I got to use my slang too woo it was soo nice everybody had a great time!! So yes, that trip was definatly something I needed and I told Sean that I want to stay in the dorms and he was very happy for me that I was finally happy. My dorms is in Ashiya but it is very very close to 3 MAJOR train stations which is hankyu, hanshin, and JR now that is very nice and useful!! So I like it I like I like it alot!! But yeah, I can get use to not having at car and going by the train woo it's fun, energy effienect, and again fun! Oh and plus I can get my exercise on yah dig ;)! Oh yea, I went to Tsutaya to rent some cd's, the guy was soo helpful to me he even closed the register to help me out. I felt soo happy he was soo nice :D. I will definatly be coming back! There's also a $1.00 store in my town so you know I will be hitting that up alot!! But yeah today I went to a festival, and I met up with someone that I met up on mixi and wow let's just say it turned out to be a guy that was trying to get with me.. and well let's say he wasn't cute *I'm just being nice since I can talk a lot of smack but the upside was was that he had a lot of money like 2 houses in Ashiya and Ashiya is the Beverly Hills of Japan but he was very respectful but don't worry yah gurl is not a gold digger! So I have my own money! So I advised him to keep that on the low low but yea moral of that story is well online people are creepy hahhaha but other than that I've been taking notes of every word I know and studying like crazy woo I've never studied so hard and this much in my life but it feels good cuz I'm determinded! other than that I will show u the pics. and enough of me speaking english haha well here's the pics. of my peeps and stuff

now i'm lost...

ok i admit i attempted to make too many friends but at the same time i dont want to see all this money go to waste and time not learning the language, my dad says to give it some time and dont worry but i am worried though... last night i was homesick for my family and friends because i can talk to them. I really do miss them esp. my honey.. well explain more later

moved into my new dorm

And man I was scared nah seriously scared everyone just seemed soo busy to talk to a foriegn student like me! :( My host mom seemed happy and relieved that I was leaving, but she did ask to come back for some cooking and I was thinking to myself NO. Yeah, I know I've been getting mean and... other than that. My room is soo huge but I have yet to furnish it and decorate it! I definatly want to do that this weekend! I'm soo excited to decorate it cuz right now it doesnt feel right esp. with no TV. Oii Yeah, the TV thing hahah I'm soo addicted to my TV man and I need radio so I will call up dad about that! Other than that I fear that the other females will be too busy to talk to me. But other than that I will provide more details soo peace!

making lemons out of lemonade or watever the saying is!

hey yall' sup I just met with one of my new japanese friends Megu and so far she is soo good to me! She gave me an electronic dictionary and she's even buying tickets to go see my fave band ORANGE PEKOE!! I'm soo excited to go shopping, clubbing, and seeing orange pekoe my fave band with her! I went out to Ashiya train station to meet up with her and I went out to this sweet indian restuarant called Shandi! It was pretty nice and the food esp. the cheesy bread was off the chain! I'm becoming more excited to move into the dorms start my new life and become more independent! Just because I'm in the dorm doesn't mean I won't study japanese! Trust me I've been making a few good japanese friends here and I'm planning on going out! But yeah, I'm going to get a radio and TV so I can watch japanese tv and hear japanese. I've just been playing japanese music too. So yes, I'm that strict on myself! Other than that, I made some bomb ass pork chops and the host family liked it haha it was my first too. So the moral is yah gurl can cook! and she likes it too! Oh about the concert tickets don't worry I'm paying her back! I've been calling dad lately and he's been so proud of me because I've been figuring things out and starting to make a few good friends here. So even though there's gonna be some drama in the future yah know yah girl can handle it but in japanese style baby well peace love yall'!!

It gets more complicated...

Hey yall' don't worry about my last post in person I'm usually a happy person that is very bubbly and sweet. But I don't take back what I said in the last post one bit, but other than that since I move to an all female dorm in the 18th it gets more complicated and the expenses keep on rising. I have to pay an extra $700 for the move. Luckily, my dad is protesting because why should we have to pay the extra money if I didn't want to move into the dorms in the first place. I have to buy my sheets, toilet trees, towels, and other things for my dorms. Overall, we're paying more money esp. for the expenses. I don't know if I should get a refridgerator or not... but I spoke to dad this morning through good ole' skype which was free!! Oh fyi downloading skype is for free!! Skype is the best make sure to get it!!! Oh but also but a mic with a video cam too a very very cheap one!! So I was speaking to dad, and he was like "That's ok that's not a big deal we'll get you all settled in!" *He didn't say it with any sarcasm either. It always reassures me to have someone that's soo positive and that knows how to make the best of everything I'm glad and grateful to have such a great real family! But I also want to buy some decorations and posters too for my new place of course everything in japanese. But yeah, today I packed up some of my stuff which is not a lot thankfully and I'm going to look for a place to buy sheets and other stuff. So if you know a good place where I can buy sheets hit me up peace!

Starting to like me

Well, unexpectedly my host family is starting to like me more and more esp. since I've been doing the dishes, cleaning, and cooking like before but more. But what am'I going to say if they change their mind and want me to stay instead well I'm going to say HELL NO. After all the stress they put me through, I'm not coming back when I step out of that door I step out for good! I will not have someone like that walk over me and think they can get away with it. As a matter of fact, they might help me move in but I'm going to say no to that too because I'd rather do it by my god damn self instead of fake ass bitches helping me do it! I'm a strong woman and I'd rather live by myself then people that didn't like me before! As much as I want to improve japanese with a host family, host family or not I'll improve all by myself! Besides I don't ever want to see them or come across them and if I do I'm going to keep it moving and pretend I don't know them! So for you that's saying I'm being mean oh please shut up because they put me through hell with their backstabbing and kicking me out within' 2 weeks of getting here! For the first time in my life, I actually don't feel bad for wanting to leave somone and not come back. I feel strong and it's going to be kept that way! Anyways I'm out peace!

My Solution

My situation has well I guess my situation made me work harder in japanese because I know for sure that pretty soon I won't be able to have it easy. What I mean by this is that I won't be able to come home to a family and practice my japanese. This means I really have to depend on myself and work really hard to achieve. So far, I have been doing this. I've been changing everything on computer to japanese, looking at clubs to participate at my school, offering students help with english in exchange for japanese, taking advantage of cheap japanese lessons, watching japanese shows, and and listening to the music. Overall, this move made me realize that it really is up to me to make this happen so I've been studying much more harder now and really paying attention to everything. I also realize that I don't want to waste a good opportunity that not everyone is fortunate to have in life. Even though, there are some people out there that aren't paitent with international students ( I haven't come across them, but witnessed it in America), I'm pretty sure that there's always someone well a lot of students out there that are paitent and want to build a friendship with them. Thanks again for your support and this bad situation will indeed pass. Other than that, I was very unfortunate esp. being the nice person that I am to have a not so caring host family. I have faith that this will pass too and I will definitely achieve my goal in Japan which is to become fluent in Japanese. I have spoken to my dad on the phone and through e-mails. This has helped a lot though! I'm glad to have family support back home but the stress hasn't been effecting my work in class though so that's exciting!! that's definatly the good part. I'll officially be moving to an all female dorms because well the new family is scared well anyways i gotta bounce so peace

More bad news and I'm soo depressed.. :(

Well, I got the bad news today well the new host family can't have me due to the fact that the father apparently is scared to have me. Well, I tend to sleepwalk but this RARELY happens it doesnt happen a lot it happens once in a blue moon. So that scared my new host dad so basically I'll have to live in an all female dorm. I'm so depressed right now. I'm living in a home where my family is counting down the days until I move out. I'm living with fake people and apparently I'm not wanted. Wow, I feel so mad and depressed right now... when the coordinator told me this he had the audicity to ask "When does your host family want you to move?!" and I replied "As soon as possible" and he was shocked but hey it's the truth he's trying to be positive but I don't feel the need to be positive. I wish the family would of told me directly instead of behind my back. I'm so lost and depressed right now that I'm reveling at the idea of going out, and trying a few drinks to make this pain go away. Sophie told me it'll make me stronger but right now I feel weak. Well, anyways I'm glad I'm moving away besides eating dinner at around 11:00 pm is not healthy anyways. Now, I miss being around those that actually geniunely like me and not faking it. I need a hug and a drink well a smoothie hahha.. off to going out peace

Moving and changing host family...

Today, I officially found out that I am changing host family due to the fact that my host family no longer wants me. I feel very sad and betrayed right now. The reason being is that my host mom is a house cleaner and she comes home late like really really late at night like at 11:00 pm or something midnight and she's stressed because she won't be able to cook me dinner early or at the proper time. I really don't mind but I guess that her schedule doesn't mix with mine or something and plus the sleepwalking kind of scared her too. But I will be moving to Shukugawa on the 16th of Sept. I will be living in a house with a 20 something sister and a host mom that can actually bake. I'm pretty sad knowing that I have to come to a home that doesn't want me... oii and I even made them spaghetti. I thought I was pretty nice, but oh well... this sucks. I guess they feel that I would be better off enough with a family that can cook me dinner early but it does suck because I knew my route to and from school to home and I thought I was getting close. Oh well, right now I prefer to move right now because I don't want to be in a house that I'm not wanted in... :( Other than that, I'm pretty sad and stressed out due to adjusting to japanese culture and moving again... oh well I won't live in a apartment with a small room. The move might be better for me but I wish it was sooner... well anyways I'm out peace!

heey

Hey sup, yall' well anyways tommorow I have school tommorow booo!! I mean come on who has school on a saturday yuck!! But for better news I'll be cooking for my host family tommorow and the meal will be spaghetti. I will definatly be taking pics. of that! Other than that I got my some mcdonalds and wooo weee they have this snack called shaka shaka and basically you have 3 types of spices you want hot chili, black pepper, and melon.... then u put it in the bag with the chicken and u shake it all up!! Cool huh well that ish was soo good it's 120 yen and it's soo good yum yum!! I'm soo addicted to it that's gonna be my daily snack on the real though! But other than that I hope in my blogs that I don't come across as glorifying Japan which I'm NOT <-- notice the word not I'm just pointing out the goods and the bads about Japan that's all so yes I'm honest and what... but yea I'm slowly but surely making a little more japanese friends esp. meeting the off the street!! They're soo friendly esp. the guys the guys are very very friendly yah dig!! But other than that, I'm planning on using lang-8 alot! I still miss taco bell like crazy but oh well hahha well anyways peace!

not lost anymore

Heey sup yall' I'm back still black and with more more pics!! Other than that, I haven't been getting lost for the past day. That's right I've been pretty good with the mean streets of Japan. Well, my hood which is is in Ashiya. But other than that I've been able to walk to and from school from the Hankyu bus station without getting lost!! I am soo good and bad ass and I'm damn proud of myself! Other than that, I've been in school taking the P-course with a quiz everyday no seriously and it's like annoying... but I'm getting to know my area of Japan a little bit and the language. I'm still anxious to be fluent more than ever but I didn't realize how hard it would be. I'm also having a hard time making friends due to the fact that I'm not fluent at all like talking like a native! In other words, it's getting hard for me to make good japanese friends that are paitent with a foreign student learning their language! Other than that the thing that I'm really impressed about Japan is that single mother's are really really rare. Like I see a 2 parent family and not a single home which is a great thing because I believe that a child can't deal with one without the other without wondering where's my dad or mom. In other words, the dad's really step it and take care of their kids not just financially but also mentally too so I give you props! In America, it's soo sad to see so many single mothers esp. without the care they need! Other than that, the mom's look good like they're 40's but looking like they're in their 20's which is a great thing! I feel like we go backwards with culture a lot of americans in their 20's look like they're in their 40's and the japanese look like their 20's in their 40's. But yeah, another thing I like is that people don't waste their food here when they get a meal they eat up everything! Like nothing is wasted which I think is a great thing!! We can definatly learn a lot from the japanese culture! Another thing I like is the fact that if you're bored or something you can hope off the train to Kyoto or Kobe within' an hour or to Osaka depending on where you live though but that's still a great thing though! I feel that's better than Vegas where you can't really go anywhere except by car and then you have to pay for gas and all this mess. Not only that but the cities are really different too that's the great thing you can always experience something differend for that weekend. I'm thinking of hitting up Kobe up myself pretty soon and maybe Kyoto! Other than that I've been taking lots and lots of pics. and still trying to master this language, but even though it's tough I do plan on moving here though! But besides that the one thing I do miss that they don't have in japan is TACO BELL and their MEXICAN PIZZA omg I would die for that right now. Oh one more thing the thing about the japanese culture is the amount of good cafes and bakeries omg! I love going to the bakeries and the cafes it is awesome I admit it it's addictive. Not only that but the pastries are usually freshly baked too yum yum! They're pretty cheap like $1-3 cheap not bad! Well anyways I will take more pics. So I gotcha well love, soul, and peace!

losing weight

Yeah, with the fact that I've been losing weight like crazy due to being lost... I feel well how can I say kinda hopeless because I really want to be fluent in japanese. I know I'm being anxious and stuff but I really want to start speaking like a native! Other than that, I can't wait till' school starts I'm in the summer session and I'm anxious to meet more japanese students! I didn't realize how tough studying abroad can be. The fact that you want to say a lot but you can't really say a lot and the fact that even though you did take japanese in school it's not the same! Because at the end of the day you're still speaking your native language. Other than that, I'm getting sleepy sorry for the short entry well peace